Bodacious Breakfast!!!

Last Saturday - 20th November - I hosted my first real Bodaciously me...! event - a breakfast the women called a Kaleidescope of Stories.  The restaurant Eat@Alltydgedacht is at a wine estate on your way to Durbanville (Cape Town).  Its a small place that has indoor and outdoor seating.  The beauty of the place is both its informality, and the care with which customers are treated - perfect for the day!  We had booked to be seated in the tent, adjoining the barrel room, however Sharon, the owner checked out the weather (on www.yr.no - a website which tells you the weather - even by the hour, in any part of the world!!!!) and it was going to be rainy.  So she gave us the barrel room.  This is a large room with huge wooden wine barrels lined up on either side of the room, leaving a not too narrow passage in the middle for the tables.  It has warm lighting interspersed with twinkly lights - like stars twinkling above.  It is a beautifully intimate space - and was perfect for the morning.  The food was divine!!


I started off 14 women, many who did not know each other, and did not know quite what to expect, but willing to take the plunge.  They were seated in 3's or 4's at a table with people they did not know.  The intention was to get them to meet new people.  I began with a welcome, and reading my poem - The Blaze of herself - and then spoke about the danger of the single stories (thanks to Chimamanda Adichie) we tell about ourselves and others.  The purpose of the day was to find the kaleidescope of stories that is each one of us.

Participants told stories about the times in their lives when their 'breast were erect, and they shook as I walked' (song of lawino - okot p'bitek).  There was a lot of laughter as people remembered the power of youth and sensuality.  We had powerful memories of childhood and deep reflection when I read my poem 'Velvety skies'

I stare at the velvety skies

through the frosted glass window

light blue... deeper blue ... purply blue

It is dusk

God made this time specially

Memories of fathers, and of grandparents , of special moments came back.  We reflected on moments of power - when we felt so absolutely in our own power.  Memories of childbirth and defiance, of pain and joy, of facing fear and going on anyway - of living flooded our minds!!!  As each woman made time to slow down, and reflect 

                her soul crackled and popped

like dry wood ready for burning

        and she saw

her reflection in the skies again

                   deep red,

       moon orange

sun gold

setting pink…

 ... ...

for she had rekindled

   the blaze of HERself  

We played with kaleidescopes, shared stories and poetry, wrote poetry, and drew with jik and ink - to create images of what had been revealed to us, of ourselves.  There was a lot of laughter, and lot of love, and a lot of support.  Each person left having connected with parts of themselves that they had forgotten and with at least 2 or 3 other women.

We don't talk no more - poetic musings

Last night I was on a panel at the Pan African Space Station in their poetry sessions called Dreaming Wide Awake.  The title of the programme was 'We don't talk no more - Poetic Musings'.  It was a conversation between young and older women writers. Nonkululeko Godana hosted it.  The other writers were Sindiwe Magona, Yewande Omotoso, Diana Ferrus and I.  We spoke and read writings about life, love, writing and the mundane in between..  It was so much fun.  I love the concept of the 'Space Station' which is a virtual radio station - you can access it through the internet.  so you are communicating with people from all over the world, and you have a live audience in front of you.  There are lots of intersting people - old and young, who just want to share their ideas, to hear, to witness, to support and to challenge. 

I enjoyed sharing my poetry, and my thoughts, and I really enjoyed being in the company of other writers and creative people, in a space that just invited you to be and to share!  Will let you know when the podcast of the evening is out!

Voysing Bodaciously...

Today I have created the word Voysing -It is the name of the workshop series I am starting in November.  They will be writing workshops working with the concept of Voice.  The indegenous Oceanic peoples say 'If I can sing, I can speak my truth.'   Indegenous Africans say, 'If I do not sing, I do not have the breath to do the work'.  Song then gives one the energy to both speak one's truth, and to do the work.  In the workshops I will explore, with participants, the idea of

Voy –aging – journeys through our lives and our

       world using words and sound (think of the poem Ithaca);

Sing-ing – using our voices to be present and connect

       to our truths, creating the energy to do the work

Voy-Sing  - speaking and writing our truths and those

       of the characters and places we story about on our

       way.

Hence the name of the workshop Voysing Bodaciously...!  We start on the 2nd, and will work for 5 weeks around the theme of Creation.  Many Creation stories speak about the world coming into being through sound, song, the word and so I feel it is appropriate that the first VoySing workshop is about Creation.

If you are interested email me at namutebi@mweb.co.za 


Bodaciously me... Philippa

A Poem

Uya Thetha?Bua? Kuluma? Hai bo!!

‘Molo Ma’, he says.

‘Molo buthi’ I reply with a smile. ‘Full tank, 95’

He opens the gas tank, puts in the ‘thingy’ and

fires a question to which I respond

‘Andi theth’isiXhosa.  Ndi ya thetha ka ncinci.’

‘I do not speak isiXhosa.  I speak very little.’

‘Hau,’ he says.  ‘U ya bua? … kuluma? … Shangaan? … Afrikaans?’

I shake my head with a half smile.

Here we go again, playing this game of

Who are you? Where do you fit? Do you really belong?

I am transported to another place and time –  

Addis Ababa, Ethiopia, 1979 
A father and daughter drive up to a bakery 
There is a long line of light skinned people 
Who look like them 
Waiting for bread.  
They  get out of the car 
Walk past the line of people 
Straight to the till 
And ask for bread. 
They people in the line start to murmur. 
The lady at the counter speaks to them abruptly in Amharic.  
The father  takes out his red id document. 
Foreigners it says. 
‘Baria.’ – ‘Slave’ we hear someone in the line say 
They get their bread and walk away 
Relieved ut unable to look them in the eyes

‘Sisi, are you Nigerian?’

I am rudely awakened from my reverie

Nigerian?  Words flash through my mind 
       
Here this means Pimp Drug dealer Hustler 
Corrupt Makwerekwere – or does it?

‘No, I come from Uganda.’

‘Where?’

‘Uganda’

To my releif

He makes no quick references to Idi Amin

Or HIV and AIDS

Only a blank stare!

(Surely we contribute more to the world than mad men and disease!)

His blank stare takes me back to another place in time

Oshakati, Namibia, 1990
A young woman is standing in line 
At the Motor Car licensing office 
To apply for a drivers license 
He insists on filling in the forms 
Asking questions in his stumbling’ English 
‘Where you born?’ 
‘Kampala, Uganda’ 
He looks puzzled. 
She spells it, and he writes it all down 
She reads it upside down 
‘Place of Birth - Town: Kampala,   District: Uganda, 
Country:  Namibia.’ 
‘Excuse me,’ she says 
‘Kampala is both the city and the district, 
Uganda is the country.  It is not part of Namibia.’ 
He looks at her very puzzled. 
‘Angola?’ 
‘No,’ She says.  ‘Uganda.  Near Tanzania.’ 
He puts his pen down and shakes his head 
In utter confusion. 
‘Difficult case,’ he says. 
‘Go to Ondangwa.’ 
And moves on to the next person in the line.

‘It is near Tanzania and DRC’ I say.

‘Oh,’ says the guy, who has finished filling up my car.  ‘Okay.  300 Rand.’

I hand him the money, and drive off

namutebi - september 2010

Answering the call..

My first bodacious act (after deciding to step out of K&S) has been to pay attention to the call to be creative. I intend to develop a programme called ‘Bodaciously me …’.  At the core of this work will be the use of creative arts processes to explore personal and collective leadership and transformation.  I have been working with an artist friend, Anne Wells, and couple of other women in our experimental Thursday morning Bodaciously me …! Workshop.  We have been testing various activities that we intend to use in a Women’s Leadership workshop and as a Personal and Team Coaching process.  We have worked with story and archetypes, creative writing and video interviews.  We have worked with chalk pastels, done weaving with unusual materials and made ‘dolls’ using found objects as a means of exploring strengths, reframing challenges, articulating our aspirations.  The intention is not to make Art, but to use the arts as a language that enables the involvement of the whole human being – head, heart, body, spirit and imagination – in the process of personal leadership and development.  The results have been surprising and powerful.  For further information about these services please contact me @ Namutebi@mweb.co.za or on +2782 894 1718.

Poetry has been an important language for my own personal reflection and over the past few years I have shared some of my poems in coaching sessions, and workshops as a reflective tool, or to stimulate discussion.  In response to the feedback I have been given I am now putting them together into an anthology of poetry which I intend to publish as a CD and later as a book.  I am working with Dorian Haarhoff as a writing mentor.

On a more personal note

I am struck by conversations about identity, displacement and about how easy it is to belong or not – both in our work place and in our social spaces.  I am also fascinated about the things that draw us towards them, and or the struggle to stay true to one’s own dreams and aspirations in the face of life’s challenges.  As I have become more intrigued by other people’s stories and the resilience of the human spirit, I have also become fascinated by my own story of growing up in Uganda during Idi Amin’s regime, and about leaving Uganda and living in Ethiopia, Kenya , Lesotho and Namibia and finally South Africa; of living with siblings who had cerebral palsy, and understanding the legacy of my parents.  This has prompted me to begin writing my story which I am sure will take some time.  The process has given me a deeper insight into my own life, and a greater respect for my parents and siblings, and the broad shoulders on which I stand.  It has also made me realize that so many in this fast-changing world are dealing with similar issues.  This is giving me material that I can use in talks about diversity, about migration, about being an African woman, a ‘foreigner’ in my own continent and the challenges of integration, and about the struggle of pursing my passions.    

On a lighter note

All this has been very intense – the reflection, the family and the writing.  For my sanity I have started singing again, as part of the Cape Town Gospel Choir, and am loving the experience of working again in a community of seriously committed singers!  We have our first concert on the 11^th of December, in the City Hall, and I can’t wait.                                                                                          

Journals

For years I have been an avid journaller.  There is nothing better than writing your thoughts out on smooth blank paper, and suddenly realising that all these thoughts rattling through your brain do have a core thread and make a lot of sense.  Writing in a nice book, on nice paper makes it all worth it.  Blank paper, as opposed to lined is so much more versatile - you can draw, you can write from any angle...!  So I have made a few Bodaciously Me journals which I am selling to all the Bodacious women of this world.  If you are interested please email me at namutebi@mweb.co.za

This weekend was the Freewheeling - future thinking Festival in Stanford.  It is a festival that encourages you to go over the edge - and try new things.  A huge focus of the festival is on green issues.  My venturing there was to explore my creative self more - through a performance of storytelling, and some of the poems that I intend to publish this year.  I firmly believe that creativity is an importantly green issue!!!!  Being there was challenging and affirming.  For me, given that it was also the first time away from my baby and the family since he was born, the most amazing thing was the time to sit and just to be... and the wonderful conversations I had with Sara, Mokgetsi, Mbali, Pat and Balu - all of whom are involved in working with creative process with people - director, art-therapist/actress, actress/poet, therapist/dance teacher, and dancer/designer/teacher.  There is a great potential for collaboration and we are going to persue this further.

For me it was the first time i performed after many years - and it was really part performance, part reading.  I thoroughly enjoyed performing again - connecting with the energy of the audience and telling a story that is important to me.  The response was good - encouraging - and I know that this process feeds me and enables me to be more bodaciously me. 

It was great to lead into the dance production Raw, which I was going to be part of but couldn't, so in a way I felt like I was part... Raw was a group of women, who are not professional dancers, put together by Balu, and telling their stories through dance.  They have all been part of Balu's programme, Moving Art, which is an exploration of self through movement and other creative modalities.  I did the moving art programme last year when I was pregnant and it was just what I needed - to be doing something creative in the outer world, and I created life within. 

An insight - or is it a remembering - that I have had recently is how creative process centres me and enables me to make sense of my life in a more profound way that just thinking about it.